Stoney

I’ve been thinking
about you more lately;
we never really got to give it
a go. Your bare tawny
skin was a fantasy of mine for years, built
on the slitted hints you’d lend
in your down-sized shirts,
your lower back always a topic
of my inner dialogue. I always forget
we did touch, but it was only physical
and even though at 25 there’s far too many ones
who got away, you’re the sole lover
who never got close.

– Los Angeles, CA

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Taken somewhere over California

Golden

Days like these, tones
in my voice and somehow in others’ too;
I stare, emptying my thoughts
at the space in front of me,
sitting at my desk wondering
why I panic every morning
to get here five minutes early
or on time at least –
an extra 10 or so bucks for the next
weekend – why I spend my best years
in nerves, planned anxiety, waiting
just to sit down comfortably one day
to talk about having lived
the dream.

– Los Angeles, CA

2014-03-08 20.05.16

Taken in Los Angeles, CA

Catch

You’re in love with my love
for you, you don’t want to
listen but you keep me with words
and eyelashes, gripping
my elbow when I turn, it’s my turn
to feel rejection: a life of bad
karma paid endlessly –
people coming back for their handouts,
hands out eyes up sneering, it must feel good –
but honestly there was never morality
with us, I pushed away a woman
who didn’t even know me; you just want to be
wanted and I guess that’s why
I’ll always love you.

– Los Angeles, CA

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Taken in Los Angeles, CA

Harvest

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Taken in Palos Verdes, CA

I feel alone when I miss Palos Verdes.
Jo says “you two will remember that
for the rest of your lives” but forgot
“for different reasons.” We were married
in the hills by the ocean away
from the lights and people who annoyed us.
I wanted to be chased and you
wanted more promises.
I got my own place and you got friends
and here we are looking back with this
“how could I forget”
but your eyes narrow with disdain
and I know it won’t be long before you do.

– Los Angeles, CA

Crows Feet

You check the mirror each day,
looking for signs of maturity,
signs of competency. Wanting
to be eligible. Then you start
passing swiftly, maybe a glimpse
at your shirt or hair but always one
motion. The perpetual motion
of aging is like that insatiable mimicking
bird, drinking water on my desk, waiting
and waiting and then suddenly it’s had enough.

– Los Angeles, CA

20150215_113027

Taken in Portland, OR